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Poems My Dog Wrote

Poems My Dog Wrote

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Category: Mama Bear: Not too long, not too short

Dad Unloads His Stuff: An Argument for Removing Barriers to Employment in Licensed Occupations for Immigrants

  • On May 16, 2019May 8, 2023

The real problem with blocking qualified immigrants from employment is the resulting unannounced visits from my father and the gifts that he bears.

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You Chose A Monster: A Look at Online Dating (With Bonus Review: The Merits of Keeping a Journal!)

  • On September 26, 2017May 8, 2023

“Did you ever live in Portland? You look like someone I made out with about 15 years ago.”

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Bikini Baristas and Other Inappropriate Work Topics

  • On September 25, 2017May 8, 2023

I offer you a bit of wisdom: bikini baristas and blowjobs are not appropriate topics for work.

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Fury and the Wheelchair: How My Job as a Busdriver Made Me a Real Asshole

  • On September 25, 2017May 8, 2023

I know that these are not the normal feelings that everyone has about mass transit, mostly because that’s what my therapist tells me.

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Lies Then and Now

  • On September 25, 2017May 8, 2023

All I know is that I was more willing to FAKE A MISCARRIAGE than go to a store and buy a box of tampons.

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I am Not at Fault: the Coming Out, and Then Subsequent Retraction, of My Role as a Sexual Predator

  • On September 22, 2017May 8, 2023

Frankly, it never occurred to me that I could be accused of sexual harassment. The request of my employee to “move that box…AND TAKE OFF YOUR SHIRT!” was simply, awesomely, hilarious.

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Donation Drive! How My Hair Fucked Over Non-Profits

  • On September 17, 2017May 8, 2023

The only time the assistant director wants to talk to me is when he’s in his Hype Man mode, which means team building, which means wasting time.

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Sundays, When Shops are Closed and Asians Don’t Work: Conversations with My Family

  • On September 16, 2017May 8, 2023

Half-truths, sweeping dismissals and blanket assumptions: is this my family legacy?

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Work: Where Sexual Harassment is Safer Than Depression

  • On September 14, 2017May 8, 2023

Sexualizing women at work is fine, but talking about depression is not.

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The Reluctant Camper, Final Third: Camping with The Gays

  • On September 9, 2017May 8, 2023

Tensions were running high. Soon I’d be asked to urinate outdoors in a campground leveled by a forest fire (was God’s message to stay home any clearer?).

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